Yeah, here's the thing: sometimes it's best to just let a joke die.
You know that person who was still saying "not!" at the end of every third sentence in, like, 1994? And how you just wished that person would at the very least just shut up already and, in extreme cases, be slapped repeatedly and in public? That's going to be the general reaction to Richard Cheese's Christmas album, Silent Nightclub.
Yes, yes, easy listening versions of alternative rock hits, we know.
It's played.
Let it go.
It's hard to gauge what's more annoying about Silent Nightclub, the mind-numbing banality of the premise or how laughably far Cheese and his cohorts go to find songs that fit the holiday theme.
"Personal Jesus"? Sure.
"Do They Know It's Christmas"? Naturally.
"Like a Virgin"? Reaching.
"I Melt with You." -- um -- why, exactly? Actually, to be bluntly honest, the most irritating aspect of the record is how it doesn't go far enough with the premise: why not enliven the songs with some whacked-out Esquivel-style space age bachelor pad arrangements to go with the smarmy nod-and-a-wink vocals? Simply put, there is little reason for this album to exist.
| Title/Composers | Performer | Listen | Time | Size | Size | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Holiday in CambodiaJello Biafra, Klaus Flouride, East Bay Ray | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:40 | 3 MB | 12 MB |
| 2 | Like a Virgin | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:27 | 3 MB | 8 MB |
| 3 | Christmas in Las VegasMark Jonathan Davis | Richard Cheese | Play | 02:08 | 4 MB | 13 MB |
| 4 | Jingle Bells | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:10 | 2 MB | 7 MB |
| 5 | Ice Ice BabyDavid Bowie, Brian May, Freddie Mercury, Roger Taylor | Richard Cheese | Play | 02:38 | 6 MB | 15 MB |
| 6 | Do They Know It's ChristmasBob Geldof, Midge Ure | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:28 | 3 MB | 9 MB |
| 7 | Personal JesusMartin Gore | Richard Cheese | Play | 02:13 | 5 MB | 12 MB |
| 8 | ImagineJohn Lennon | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:47 | 4 MB | 12 MB |
| 9 | Naughty GirlBeyoncé Knowles, Giorgio Moroder, Scott Storch, Donna Summer | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:51 | 4 MB | 10 MB |
| 10 | Christmastime Is HereVince Guaraldi, Lee Mendelson | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:30 | 3 MB | 9 MB |
| 11 | The TreesGeddy Lee, Alex Lifeson, Neil Peart | Richard Cheese | Play | 02:33 | 5 MB | 15 MB |
| 12 | I Melt with You | Richard Cheese | Play | 02:47 | 6 MB | 15 MB |
| 13 | Silent Night | Richard Cheese | Play | 01:31 | 3 MB | 10 MB |
| 14 | Last Christmas | Richard Cheese | Play | 00:20 | 0 MB | 1 MB |
| 15 | Holidae In | Richard Cheese | Play | 02:01 | 4 MB | 12 MB |
| 27 mins | 62 MB | |||||
| 27 mins | 167 MB | |||||
| Artist | Job | |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Louis Allen | Bass |
| 2 | Arden Ash | Photography |
| 3 | Kevin Bartley | Mastering |
| 4 | Jello Biafra | Composer |
| 5 | David Bowie | Composer |
| 6 | Charles Byler | Drums |
| 7 | Richard Cheese | Member of Attributed Artist, Primary Artist, Vocals |
| 8 | Mark Jonathan Davis | Composer, Graphic Design |
| 9 | Peter DiRado | Tracking |
| 10 | East Bay Ray | Composer |
| 11 | Frank Feta | Drums, Member of Attributed Artist |
| 12 | Klaus Flouride | Composer |
| 13 | Bob Geldof | Composer |
| 14 | Martin Gore | Composer |
| 15 | Vince Guaraldi | Composer |
| 16 | Beyoncé Knowles | Composer |
| 17 | Geddy Lee | Composer |
| 18 | John Lennon | Composer |
| 19 | Alex Lifeson | Composer |
| 20 | Brian May | Composer |
| 21 | Lee Mendelson | Composer |
| 22 | Freddie Mercury | Composer |
| 23 | Jack Monterey | Executive Producer |
| 24 | Giorgio Moroder | Composer |
| 25 | Neil Peart | Composer |
| 26 | Scott Peters | Vibraphone |
| 27 | Martin "Boney" Provolone | Member of Attributed Artist, Trombone |
| 28 | Jim Rasfeld | Graphic Design |
| 29 | Richard Cheese & Lounge Against The Machine | Primary Artist |
| 30 | Bobby Ricotta | Member of Attributed Artist, Piano |
| 31 | Nola Schoder | Production Coordination |
| 32 | Mitchell Sigman | Tracking |
| 33 | Scott Storch | Composer |
| 34 | Wayne String | Bass (Electric), Member of Attributed Artist |
| 35 | Donna Summer | Composer |
| 36 | Yukihide Takiyama | Bass (Electric) |
| 37 | Roger Taylor | Composer |
| 38 | Midge Ure | Composer |
| Quality | Format | Encoding | Description |
|---|---|---|---|
| Standard | MP3 | 320kps 44.1kHz | MP3 is an audio coding format which uses a form of lossy data compression. The highest bitrate of this format is 320kbps (kbit/s). MP3 Digital audio takes less amount of space (up to 90% reduction in size) and the quality is not as good as the original one. |
| CD Quality | FLAC | 16bit 44.1kHz | FLAC is an audio coding format which uses lossless compression. Digital audio in FLAC format has a smaller size and retains the same quality of the original Compact Disc (CD). |